Skip to main content

Solidarity

 Remember the kids at school who were so cool because they could flip their eyelids inside out?  It was like the coming of age in the second grade.  By third grade they were mesmerizing the rest of the class by shoving thumb tacks through their callouses.  In the fourth grade, they were able to whistle by blowing on a piece of grass between their thumbs.  I'm pretty sure those kids grew up to be movie stars.  Somehow I missed the boat.  Bad jeans...highwaters actually.    

I thought I'd give my kids a leg up by teaching them the joke about "see" food.  That was a mistake.  I should have seen that coming. Ha. Ha. Ha.  Please don't laugh, it will only encourage me.  

Our kids don't have much hope in the cool department.  Have I mentioned this before?  Their dad had the nickname "Pineapple Head" in high school, and well, I was wearing Little House on the Prairie dresses up until the ninth grade.  Luckily, I could run fast or I probably would have gotten beaten up. Actually, Lorena Bobbitt was a nickname I was given by classmates in middle school, maybe that did just as much to save me as it did to annoy me.  

As we start considering sending our kids to school, the question of whether or not they will fit in and find good friends weighs on my mind.  I want them to like school and I know the social aspect plays a large part of that.  We have had more playdates recently, and I've felt some relief to see other kids with equally terrible dance moves, who also tell bad (as in not funny) jokes, and who struggle with getting dressed into appropriate clothing as much as our kids.  No, it doesn't make it less of a problem, but there is some satisfaction in knowing they aren't alone in their struggles.  And neither are we.

   

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Little Bit Dicey

 This might be a little controversial.  I try to steer clear of such topics in this space, but it needs to be said.  Take it as you will, but know that it comes from a place of love, concern, and respect.  Here it is: there is a right  way to cut an onion. Now, I'm not saying this to try and get anyone's dander up.  I'm just saying it's a subject that needs to be addressed in kitchens across America.  There may be more than one right way to skin a cat (I can't say I've tested that), but the same does not hold true for onions.  Please, you can teach an old dog new tricks - learn how to properly cut an onion.  It will save you time, frustration, onion tears, and possibly a finger.     Now, since I'm still sitting here on blogspot like it's 2003, I'm not going to post any how-to videos, but I'll do the next best thing.  I'll paste a link right here .    Check it out.  Practice it.  Make it a habit.  T...
Post a Comment
Read more

Advanced Placement

 Not to brag or anything, but I think we are raising some very advanced children.  At two-years-of-age, our girls have already worked out the art of manipulation and deflection.  It's the antithesis of endearing.   They went missing the other day - the girls did.  That's never a good situation.  They were in the house, and I knew they were in the house, but I couldn't see or hear them.  Silence is the loudest alarm system.  Fischer took action and found them both in my bathroom.   "MOM!" I met them in the hall.  Carter was covered in clumps and blobs of hand cream. "Emi did it," was her unsolicited response.   "No," I told her.  "I think you  did it." That night I got ready for bed and pulled out my one "self-care" splurge - my face cream .  It was in my drawer where I always keep it.  The lid was screwed on.  And it was empty, wiped clean.  "EmmmeerrrrrSON!" Guilty.  They were both ...
2 comments
Read more

How to Tame a Toddler (and other myths in parenting)

I used to think I had started to hone my parenting skills.  Fischer was a much more mellow toddler than Sawyer, and I credited Ross and myself having the experience of one child under our belts.  It turns out, I was wrong.  Fischer was just a more mellow toddler .  That, or we have substantially regressed in our skills since having the twins.  It could be that. They are terrorists.   Nobody and nothing is off limits.   Our walls are covered in crayon and pencil.  Our new kitchen table has been branded with marker.  There is crayon on the windows.  My cupboards and drawers are empty.  My counter tops are full. They have figured out how to climb up on the table, and how to climb onto the windowsill and over the back of the couch, how to climb out of their cribs, and how to climb out of their clothes!       Our boys did not do these things.   I wasn't prepared.   I thought we had a plan...
Post a Comment
Read more