Cat Lady

 

I have heard people say that getting toddlers to do something is a lot like herding cats.  I disagree.  Herding cats sounds possible.  I think I'd rather do that.  Cats are certainly more predictable than toddlers...at least our toddlers.  

To that point, today I had one of the twins pointing out my "owies" and kissing them, next thing I know she turns around and slaps her sister, then hits the ground and starts meowing like a kitty.  (A feral kitty if you ask me.)  I sat there in stunned silence, not because I was surprised by her antics, but because her sister jumped right in and slapped her back.  I had an all out brawl...or cat fight on my hands, and they're only two.  What are they going to be like when they are thirteen?!

Maybe it's our combined genetics, or lack of parenting skills, or maybe we just drew a couple of wild cards.  I don't know.  I do know that in the last two days both my sister and Ross have brought up Nanny 911.  I'd forgotten about that show.  She made it look so easy before I had kids.  I wonder where she is now?  Is she still available???  

I have so many questions.  Hypothetically speaking, what do you do when your toddler throws a shoe at you while you're driving; when they get out of bed eighty-seven times a night; when they scream at the slightest touch of a comb; when they empty the entire package of wipes, diapers, hair ties, and spray-in conditioner during their nap; when they go limp noodle every time you try to dress them; when they mix flour and watermelon juice on your floor, draw on your windows, and put Vaseline in their hair?  What do you do when your toddler has already mastered the arm cross, pouty lip, glare down-stare down?  Just, you know, hypothetically of course.  

Our toddlers do teach us so many things.  They teach us that closed doors are meant to be open, if you want to be heard - yell the loudest, privacy is a privilege and not a right, and everything is theirs.  I  didn't know we had so much stuff before we had two toddlers lay it all out on the living room floor for me.  All of it.  Cats don't do that.  

It's all a season.  This one is winter with a few false springs.  

I've never been much of a cat person.  I guess we'll hang onto these two clowns and see what they turn into.  Pray for us!