Skip to main content

Tooth Fairy Anxiety

I knew having kids was going to be hard - sleep deprivation, worry, stress, hard choices, etc.  But nobody said anything about the tooth fairy.  

I kind of hate her.  

I mean, it's precious.  For the first tooth.  For the first kid.  After that, I think she stinks.  I might be the worst version of the tooth fairy.  What's the going rate on teeth these days?  I don't know.  My kids are probably getting ripped off.  I'm just hoping they don't start comparing notes with their friends at school.

"What did you get?"

"$10!  How about you?"

"A pile of change, some lint, and a tooth brush..."

"Huh.  Maybe you need to brush better."

My biggest problem is remembering to be the tooth fairy.  I had to set three alarms for the last tooth.  My other problem is that my kids want to be freaking pen pals with "her."  So many letters!  So many unanswered letters...  

I tried.  Then I forgot.  Then they got real confused and sad.  I'm a miserable human.  Ross jumped in and told them he had received a message that the tooth fairy would not be able to visit again until a tooth was available for her to pick up.  That was nice, but garnered many questions that I wasn't quite prepared to answer.  It also didn't work.  

Fischer kept trying to make contact.  He was so distraught to be six with no wiggly teeth.  He demanded answers.  Mercifully, the boy has finally lost his first tooth, and he has the best gap and whistle to show for it.  The letters have stopped for now.  I can breathe a little easier until the next one.  Which brings me to the realization that we have a lot of tooth fairying ahead of us. 

Help. 
*photo credit: Ross St. Clair
**don't mind the snot
***just focus on those eyes

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Pink Stinks

Our girls, like most four-year-old girls, love pink.  And purple.  And sparkly things, unicorns, butterflies, lizards and cats.  But especially pink.  Their brothers aren't so fond of pink.  They prefer the color dirt.  I know this because it's what they have chosen for the color of our walls, windows, light switches and their socks.   "Do you like pink?"  Emerson asked Fischer one day not long ago. "No." "Why?" "Because pink stinks !" Cue 'angry tears and screaming.' This of course delighted her brother who began using the line anytime he wanted to see her cry.  Which was often.  It didn't change her passion for the color, however.  She still demanded the pink plate, pink cup, pink shirt, pink shoes, and pink gum if she had the choice.  Because pink is the best when you're four.   Fast forward a couple of weeks.  The girls were collecting pieces of garbage off the van floor.  Why?  I don't know, b...
Post a Comment
Read more

Triple Threat

 People think we are raising twins, but they're wrong.  We actually have triplets: Emerson, Carter, and Carterror.  It's true.  Carterror doesn't hang around often, but when the days are long and naps have been missed, she comes out swinging.   Today, when we should have been napping, we ran errands.  We needed some grain for our cows, so before picking up the boys from school, we stopped at the feed store.  The girls spent a little time looking at all the fish, birds, and pets they have for sale.  Immediately, after telling them not to touch the tanks, Carter tried to go fishing.  That's when I realized Carterror had arrived.  I called her name to stop her and realized her shirt was exceptionally lumpy.   "What's in there?" I asked, pointing to her newly developed bosom.   "My kitty," she replied, pulling out a stuffed cat from her sweatshirt.  A minute later, we were walking down an isle of bovine parapher...
Post a Comment
Read more

Fear Factor

 Did you know that it has been not  scientifically proven that a baby can smell her mother's presence through a closed door.  It's probably the smell of fear that they are actually attuned to, but nonetheless.  I hold my breath and walk on tiptoe past the baby's room and still get busted nearly every time.  My fear is pungent. Besides waking the babies, I have another fear currently in the forefront of my mind.  Don't mind me, this is just another episode of True Confessions.. .  Here it is: the boys are getting so much outside time that they are building up incredible endurance.  It's great really, but it is   becoming  so hard to wear them out. It used to be an hour at the playground and we were golden.  Now, they basically put in an eight-hour workday, and it's just a warm-up!  Does anybody have a treadmill....?  Real school is going to be a bit of an adjustment for the big guy next fall.    Speaking of s...
4 comments
Read more