Not so adventures of the St. Clair clan...

 Tomorrow is a transition day at our house.  Ross goes back to work tomorrow.  If you have ever had kids and are breathing, you probably know what this means.  If you don't, then you've probably never yelled at your kid either.  It probably never rains on the weekend where you live.  And your dog probably poops gold nuggets.   Transition days in our house, are hhhhhard.   This time around, I feel a little more prepared because Ross reminded me it was coming.  To get in the right mindset, I gave myself a root canal this morning without Novocain, I listened to the first line of "Wheels on the Bus" play on repeat 147 times, I ate a package of saltines without any water, and I dropped a boulder on my foot.  I'm feeling like I've got this.   I'm getting up early, taking a shower, and making a strong  cup of vodka  coffee.  I have low expectations set for the entire crew, and if the "gold nuggets" hit the fan...

It's shocking to me that I've been a mom now for seven years.  It feels like an instant and an eternity all at once.  I can't remember my life without kids (I must have been very bored), but at the same time I can't believe it's already been seven years since we brought Sawyer home for the first time.  It seems like yesterday.  Time is funny like that. Sawyer's birthday was earlier this month, which everyone already knows.   Because he told them.   He has told every person he knows and many that he doesn't.  They were in the wrong place at the wrong time.  Lord love him.  He loves  his birthday.   He started inviting people to his party approximately five months ago.  He invited the eye doctor, and for a second I was worried the man might accept.  He invited kids on the playground and at church, adults we are friends with and some we barely know.  We encourage hospitality in our family, but we are still...

It's August. I guess I can stop waiting for that call from the Oregon Department of Education.  It appears I didn't earn teacher of the year after all.  I wonder if it had something to do with my mask policy?  It definitely could have been the mask policy.   Personally, I thought the duct tape worked great.   *Sigh* It was probably the mask policy.  You win some.  You lose some.  Better luck next year.   Speaking of next year, we are trying a hybrid homeschool program.  Sawyer gets to go to school twice a week and learn at home the other days.  I'm confident he will fall in love with his teacher in the first eight minutes.  She is young, cute and very enthusiastic.  It's going to either make him work really hard or be a complete distraction.  Either way, on the "home" days, I'm going to make her look really good.  Pajama Mama is neither young nor cute and I'm rarely enthusiastic (which may have als...

 I'm the place chain letters come to die.  I'd forgotten about these gems until a friend recently asked if she could send one to our boys.  I acquiesced because, dang it, I'm an adult.  In the past, I've had the best of intentions with recipe chain letters, socks chain letters, and every variety that came through the mail in the nineties.  I have had approximately zero success at following through on these intentions.  Surely, I've matured in this area of sending mail.   Nope.  No, I have not.   The guilt and the shame are familiar.  Every time I look in the direction of the "to deal with" pile and see the neatly folded papers waiting to be addressed, I shudder.  I need  to deal with you.  There are kids depending on me, darn it!  I can't.  I just can't.  I will.  Maybe.   Here's the thing, I'm happy to send the package of stickers or whatever to the first person on the list.  I...

Some things just shouldn't be done naked.  Let me leave that there for a minute...  I erroneously thought our boys had approached the age that they could decipher between acceptable and unacceptable naked activities.  In the unacceptable category: tree climbing.   Actually, I'm not as surprised as I probably should be that I had to educate our boys on that (potential future grandchildren - you're welcome).  They were pretend camping.  Their clothes were hanging from the tree branches because frankly, they couldn't fit everything in their backpack, and they didn't want stuff getting full of burrs.  I can appreciate that.  Also, it didn't work.  Their stuff still got full of burrs.   But why was a child up the tree naked?  It was time to change out of pajamas and into work clothes, of course. Of course.   Sometimes I want to get inside their brains, and sometimes I want to stay very, very far away.   "Hey...

 "Mom, can you leave?"  I refuse to be insulted.  My cup is half full.  Because I am  leaving and they are staying.   It's a sleepover day at the grandparents, and you would think it had been months since the boys were last there.  In reality, it's been three days and only two since they last saw Grammy.  Nonetheless, they were excited.  We only live twenty minutes away, but on the drive over they couldn't help but ask, "how much longer?"...twice.   Grandparents are the best.  I think so too.   Yesterday, I was also wondering "how much longer?!"  Today, of course, the boys have been the best!   I almost didn't want to give them up for the day.  Almost.  They were playing outside in the cool of the morning, and it was like two boys I haven't seen in weeks.  I think the heat has been making everyone cranky.   I ran out and snapped this photo, so that next week...or tomorrow...when...

 I try not to be a hot mess of a mom.  At least not in public.  Some people wear it like a badge, and some fake it until they make it, or at least until they are back in the car.  I try to be in the latter camp, but if ever there was a day... I started out my day by completely melting the handle off of our BBQ chimney.  Probably not something you want to do ever, much less during fire season.   Next, I embarrassed myself as only I can do...twice.   After lunch I watched one of our boys meltdown over a sucker that didn't even belong to him.  It was such an incredible fit that I finally picked him up and deposited him in his bed for an impromptu nap.   Only one baby girl would nap today. Only one baby girl would go down at bedtime.   In addition, the piles all over our house, and porch, and deck, and garage are threatening to take over...and it scares me that they might actually succeed.   In the midst of all ...