The Orley's Stove and Spa man may have just saved our marriage.
Let me back up a little and set the scene for you:
About two years ago Ross, the boys, and I started driving out to this property my parents bought. It was their plan to fix up the house and flip it. They needed some trees cleared around the place and asked Ross if he would be interested in the work. The boys loved playing there, Ross enjoyed clearing the land, and I liked helping create brush piles that we would later burn. Long story short, there were some zoning issues that came into play, the house didn't sell right away, and we wound up buying it for ourselves this past spring.
In clearing the underbrush, Ross had cut down dozens of trees. All of the trees that made good firewood were neatly stacked on the property. Then Ross bought a couple of truck loads of madrone and oak logs that he cut down to the length and size of firewood. Needless to say, we now had a dozen or more cords of firewood on the property. But with all that wood, we had no woodstove. We had a woodstove in the works, but nothing installed until just before Christmas.
When the stove was finally in place, Ross was as excited as a kid on Christmas to get the thing fired up. It didn't take long before we were heated right out of the house. So we went for a drive while things settled down. We got home and my chocolate stash had melted, the candles were sagging, and the house was about 92 degrees. I put on my bathing suit and lay on the floor. Heat rises, you know. We opened the French doors in our bedroom and pretended we were just enjoying the December evening. Some guys buy new cars and have to see how fast they can go, others buy woodstoves and see how hot they can get things. The answer is hot. Very hot.
So that's how things started out with our Blaze King. That's the brand of woodstove - not Ross' nickname. Although....
Side note: he got the big one. The difference in price point was so small it would be crazy not to get the big one - his argument, not mine. I think it can heat like 7000 square feet instead of, I don't know, 5000 square feet. So, like, four of our houses instead of just three. Anyway, apparently size matters.
So the big beast of a stove efficiently heats our home, but it smokes. It smokes so bad that it has stained our wall and gives us all sore throats. It makes me mad, like irrationally mad. I don't know who to be mad at, but the inner dialogue with the smoking beast is pretty intense. It's possible that I may have errantly directed some of that anger toward the individual who picked out the smoking stove. It's also possible that I may have alerted the same individual to the smell of smoke every single day since...let's see, it was installed December 19th, so I'd say about since....December 19th.
Ross attempted to fix it more than once. It smoked less, but wasn't right. I stubbornly, held to the fact that it wasn't my project. At the same time, I hated it SO MUCH. I finally, had a come to Jesus moment and decided that I could make an effort to help, so I called the Orley man. I wanted Ross to do it, but it's like asking for directions. It wasn't happening. I called the Orley man, and told him I desperately needed help. Either the smoke needed to go or I was going. I made it clear it was a point of contention. He obviously recognized my level of hysteria, and was quick to suss out the problem. If his fix actually works, then I may have to send the guy flowers. He, not quite literally, may have saved our marriage...
** I really do like our wood heat, but it's my duty as a loving wife to harass my husband as much as I can. I think it was in our wedding vows. He also knows I really like him. He has pretty eyes.
***Also, if you're in the market, may I recommend those Orley's Stove and Spa guys?
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