I'm in the midst of baby naps being the only really productive part of my day. I know productivity isn't the "most important" thing, but there are some chores that have to get done (i.e. bills) and some that I really want to get done. The problem is, that while the girls are finally in a predictable nap routine, the boys have recently given up naps. It was six-and-a-half glorious years, so I'm not complaining, but when they aren't napping they want to "help."
I should embrace and appreciate that they want to be helpers...and I do. But. But they want to help with ev-ery-thing I do. Sometimes...sometimes I just really want to do it myself. Most of the time, it's much more efficient to do it myself. I'm trying not to squelch the helping spirit, but I've got a muscle twitch that won't go away. I think it's tension.
This is how it goes: I am shoveling dirt. Sawyer loves to dig. Sawyer asks to help. I'm trying to level a space. I ask him to wait. He starts to dig a few feet away, he can't help himself. He slowly inches his way closer, chatting all the while, until he's standing in my shadow almost directly on my toes. Deep breath. I move. He moves. I move again. He moves again. This isn't working. I take a break. He takes a break. Deep breath.
I'm cooking lunch. Fischer asks if he can do it. I say, "Not now, I'm trying to be quick." Fischer picks up the spoon I just set down and starts stirring for me anyway. He sloshes what was going to be lunch all over the counter. He feels terrible. Now I'm cleaning the counter and starting lunch again. This is not quick. The muscle twitch gets louder.
Sometimes they really are helpful, and I want them to continue to be excited to help. I also want to keep them involved and teach them all these skills because I know someday it will pay off. But I also want some "me" time to just sweat it out over a posthole digger. Balance. We are trying really hard to learn balance. In the meantime, this twitch...
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